Naught E. Piggy
Speaks Out
On World
Leaders
Thursday, 17 March 2003: NP News - Pattaya, Thailand.
Dailys News: Alright Naughty, let's give the people your views of the
world leaders today. I'll give you a name, and you let 'er rip.
NP:
(farts) Whoops! I jumped the gun!
Dailys News:
Geez, NP. I didn't mean it like that!
NP:
What? I don't smell anything.
Dailys News: OK, ready?
NP:
I'm all pig-ears.
Dailys News:
George W. Bush
NP:
You know. I was watching the food channel when I had an epiphany.
Ole G. Dub looks like Emril Lagassi! Especially when he smirks. You
know, it kind of gives a whole new meaning to the word, "BAM!"
Dailys News: Kim Jong Il
NP:
That pifflicator must bathe in JINRO to be so mad. I've never heard such
flapdoodle in my life. Someone needs to defuse that nuke happy trash
talker before he turns the world into "a sea of flame." I'll give him a
sea of flame, alright and a frickin' hair cut.
Dailys News: Colin Powell.
NP:
Ah, now he's all mac! Daddy's definitely gettin' a little brown sugar from
that nappy spice girl, Condoleezza Rice--if you know what I mean. You go
girl!
Dailys News: Saddam Hussein
NP:
Stinky fingers I guarantee. His words are nothing but Arab hogwash.
I hear he likes boys to. You ever seen him bounce them on his knee?
Anyhow, You want to find poisonous gas? Check his drawers. You
might even find a pork sandwich.
Dailys News:
Ari Fleischer
NP:
Mama's boy.
Dailys News:
Jacques Chirac
NP:
Let him eat Freedom Fries!
Dailys News:
Kimfucious
NP:
Hey, now that's a trick question!
Dailys News:
Indulge me.
NP:
Alright, he's a man after my own heart. Oscar Wilde once said: "A
true gentleman is one who is never rude unintentionally." Kimfucious is an
up and comer.
Bye the way...
Dailys News:
Yes?
NP:
Where's the bathroom?
Dailys News:
Down the hall to the left, NP. OK, signing off for now.
Kimfucious... Dailys News... Thailand.
The views
and opinions of Naught E. Piggy--as
expressed here--do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of